My wife Chrissy (or Chris) died in Dec of 2009 of breast cancer. It was a horrific experience and it really made me appreciate what I have, as well as what I have lost. It's amazing to me how easy it is to ignore the things that really matter in life. I'm a different person now. I used to be rather negative about things in general and it's ironic that losing the sweetest person I've ever met in my life has made me more positive. It's a paradox.
Don't get me wrong, I can still be negative but not to the degree that I was before she died. I think it's because I realize how quickly something can be taken away, and you need to appreciate what you have. I was talking to my wife's sisters last night, and it was a great conversation. Listening to their ideas of what the afterlife is like, how it works, etc... I am unsure if there is a god, an afterlife, etc... I just don't know. But we started talking about what we missed most about her. I've been asking everyone I know what they miss most about my wife. And it's amazing. It's a common theme. How she made everyone feel comfortable, loved, or just so special. She had a gift that is very rare. How many people do you know can make anyone they meet feel special, without "faking" it. That was her gift.
Don't get me wrong, she had faults. She was not a perfect person. But she had a way about her that was open and honest. A gift for making you look at yourself in a way that you never knew you could. She made you look at what was special about you. I'm lucky to have known her. I'm even luckier to have married her. And even luckier that I got to spend 26 years with a person who is one in a million.
And I loved her enough to let her go.